Independence is something all women should be proud of and knowing your own shit and owning it is a real skill. Letting it all fall to pieces when you meet a hot guy and decide you want to spend the rest of your life with him is not cool and he definitely won’t think so either.
Clinginess is a real downer and a serious relationship killer. This is extra true at the beginning of a relationship and it could see that dream man run for the hills before you’ve even got started. If it’s been awhile since you’ve been with someone it can be hard not to want to cling onto them but if you want them to stick around, have some respect for yourself. The last thing you want is for the guy to think your lonely and desperate.
Think about how you feel when a guy is too clingy. Even the hottest men look pretty unattractive when they’re never out of your face and desperately hanging around all the time. You don’t like it, so why should they?
If you’re worried about how desperate you look then check out these three points, if you say yes to any of them, there’s a chance you’re on the verge of driving that guy away:
You Don’t Give Him Any Space
Have you text him today already? Have you asked him what he’s doing tonight? Have you attempted to get involved and find a space for yourself in his schedule even if he already has plans? Give the guy some space!
When you really like someone it is normal to want to be around them the whole time, but it is essential to have at least some time apart, to breathe and enjoy your own company. Nagging and asking a thousand questions will ensure he stops being interested, you’ll become irritating and boring and he’ll want to spend even more time away from you.
You Don’t Make Plans
Do you have plans to see your girls? Do you have ANY plans at all? This doesn’t mean you plan to sit in and binge on Netflix on your own, it means have you stopped going out and enjoying yourself without the guy?
Never making plans on the off-chance he might want to see you is a serious fail. Not keeping up a life of your own and enjoying the things you enjoy, without the guy, is a dangerous step and you will find yourself pining and probably bothering him even more. Still go out with your mates, still stick to plans already made, if he comes knocking you can fit him in when you have time.
You Crave Too Much Attention
If you constantly whine and nag your Boyfriend to do things for you, he’ll start viewing you as a spoilt child he has to look after and not his hot-ass girlfriend. If you expect him to do everything for you and see you all the time, just because you’re his girlfriend, he’ll soon get sick of it. Constantly kissing and cuddling him and wanting him to be all over 24/7 will drive him nuts and he’ll soon crave his own space and break up with you.
You Obsess Over Him Cheating (or Leaving you)
Insecurity is seriously not attractive and whilst it can be hard to fight, if the guy is right for you then he isn’t going to cheat. Everyone feels insecure at some time or another but if you are obsessively and constantly worried he’s with other women or he’s going to leave you then it’s a sign you need to back off a bit.
If you reach the stage where you’re checking his phone or constantly bothering him, asking about different women, don’t expect him to stick around.
Just relax. Play it cool. That doesn’t mean you have to play games and mess with each others heads. Just give him some space to have is own life while you make an effort to enjoy yours too. As soon as he knows you’re confident enough to do things without him, he’ll soon want to be with you more.